Well yesterday was my birthday! yay! I am finally 18. Which is wonderful because now I can buy cigarettes, go to jail as an adult, and buy lotto tickets (none of which I plan to do!) I can however vote, order things from the television, and officially drive to the bank to deposit Chick-Fil-A's money (I say official because once I went when I was 17 and it wasn't technically...legal) ANYWAY. It was also the day of Leander High's prom. I didn't go (in case you were dying to know) I just don't think that spending my birthday at a dance is ideal. First of all I can't dance (especially not the way everyone else does...gross) second of all, I'm not a fan of mainstream music (only type of music played at school dances) third, I didn't have a date, and even if someone had asked me he wouldn't have been the person I'd wanted to be there with (since he already had a date). So you see why I instead chose to go on a 14 mile kayaking trip with my dad. Oh you don't see why anyone in their right mind would choose to do that on their birthday? I suppose you have a point. Kayaking isn't exactly my idea of a fun time either, but my dad really wanted to go and I tend to go out of my comfort zone if it means quality time with my papa. I'm not a particularly strong kayak-er. I am not very fast and I have a hard time avoiding trees (actually I didn't know that until yesterday.) I'd honestly rather be in a motor boat, or a gondola (seeing as how a usually attractive Italian man rows for you). I wouldn't have gone, but my dad was apparently planning on going whether I was there or not (On my birthday? How dare he!) He actually invited my brother to go after I'd declined the first time, but then after hearing him ask my brother I reconsidered. After all what could be so bad about 14 miles down the San Marcos river? HA! So the day started off icky looking and it looked as though the clouds would release their treasures at any minute. It didn't look like a promising birthday. So my dad and I started off on our adventure. He had high hopes for the day and I was secretly praying it wouldn't take that long to paddle 14 miles. So we're paddling along, paddling along...paddling along for what seems like hours...neither of us are really talkative...I'm quietly whispering "I think I can" under my breath and I have the urge to ask how much longer (I hadn't yet because I didn't want to sound eager to finish or give the impression that I was complaining) I finally did ask and to my dismay we hadn't even met the 5 mile mark yet. The current was almost nonexistent and I was slowly dying of boredom. Finally my dad and I find something to talk about and the conversation keeps us busy until we hit a fork in the river. My dad swears he said "go to the left" but I swear he said "right." So of course I paddled to the right side. Well turns out there's this hugenormous tree blocking the whole right side of the river and the only way to get through it is to lay flat on my kayak and float underneath. Well this may have sounded and even looked simple enough. To anyone else it may have even been simple enough...however I am not just anyone. Before I go on I'd like to mention that I am TERRIFIED of spiders. Bring on snakes and sharks but if I see a spider of any size I scream like a 4 year old little girl. Prior to coming to this fork in the river I'd had a harrowing experience with a pregnant spider who decided to jump on my kayak after I'd had a nasty run in with a tree that must have previously been its home. I screamed like a small girl and with one clean swipe of my paddle I sent the spider flying to who knows where. It still freaked me out and after that I became a little paranoid. MEANWHILE back at the fork in the river I am trying to lay as flat as I can on my kayak so that I can float under this unnecessarily large tree. I get about half way under it when I realize the ENTIRE underside is carpeted with spiders the size of a silver dollar. Well I can't go backwards so I continue to the other side with a speed that I'd never before reached. I sit up and there are at least 10 spiders on my kayak. I went crazy, I was freaking out. I've never been so afraid in my life...well there was that one time. Anyway I'm wildly swinging my paddle around trying to smash these spiders who were obviously going to devour me whole. After nearly falling off my kayak, hitting myself in the back of the head with my paddle, screaming like a banshee, and almost passing out after finding a spider on my hand I was able to get rid of all of the spiders on my kayak (or so I thought, I later found at least three more stowaways) The rest of the kayaking trip consisted of me running into every single tree on the bank of the San Marcos River (it was like they were magnetic and I was made of steel), being knocked out of my kayak by several of those trees (I believe there were 5 of these instances, one of which I was carried away by the current while my kayak remained stuck in the tree my foot then caught on a stray piece of fishing line which I thought might cut off my foot but luckily it broke. This also happened to be the one moment I'd taken off my life jacket to work on my tan and I am a terrible swimmer...I am a more qualified drowner) and an embarrassing run in with a tree in which I ended up in an awkward half upside down position with my feet being the only barrier between me and a spider web covered tree and my paddle swinging pointlessly at a branch of spiders too far out of my reach (I only say this is embarrassing because there was this random woman who was sitting on the side of the river. I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact that we were in the middle of nowhere and she was randomly staring at me while I fought off a tree, or amused at the thoughts that might have been running through her mind.) The 14 mile trip took about 6 hours. I got myself through it by checking out the cool things in nature that didn't have 8 legs such as this funny lookin caterpillar.
I also found great comfort in singing "Just Around the River Bend" from Pocahontas at the top of my lungs when I thought my dad was out of earshot (unfortunately I only know the line "I look once more Just beyond the river bend, beyond the shore" and so I had to make up my own lines. (ie I hate the trees, they're all out to get me! I've scabbed my knees just trying to escape. Oh look some more, I know that they are hiding out Just around the riverbeeeeeend for me! Coming for me!)) After the 14 miles was up I could barely move my arms, I was exhausted and sore from my waist up (who knew you used more than your arm muscles) Although it may sound like I had a terrible birthday I didn't. I enjoyed the time with my dad and after the sunburn loses it's sting it will turn into a beautiful tan (which will peel off and I will once again be back to an off white color) I got to eat at my favorite restraunt (Posados) and when I got home I fell into bed and slept soundly through the night.I still can't move and my sunburn hurts something awful but it was pretty much worth it. I had a great birthday :) Thanks Dad for the great day and I love you. Happy Mother's day to all the mothers. (who am I kidding my own mother doesn't read this why would any others?)
